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change Day growing up Happiness life Love society Space story Thoughts Uncategorised

Stay

by:Ishika

A heaviness falls on my chest as I hear him say the words again, for the umpteenth time today. 

“Stay.” He begs, with a pleading voice. 

“I can’t, not anymore.” I say, with an icy chill in my voice that puts him over the edge as his eyes go small and his face falls. I wrap my arms around his frame one last time and as I wait for his arms to find their way onto my back, I can’t help but contemplate staying for a little long. But I don’t wait. I don’t wait for him to hug me back and I walk away.

There are days when I hear those words ringing in my mind in a litany, when nothing else makes sense. There are days when I hear those words ringing in my mind on loop, where everything seems to have fallen into the background, like a motley of colours splashed on a canvas haphazardly. On either one of those days, I wish that you were here, to calm my ocean down and tell me that it will all be okay. The truth might be far from it, but just this once, I might actually believe you. 

I have been keeping this under wraps for long, in fear that once these words roll off my tongue, it just might be real. There is no going back after that. It takes only one to fall in love and I just might be the testimony to that, just like it takes only one person to wreak havoc and orchestrate loss. There is definitely an odd comfort that comes with being in the company of strangers; where no one knows you, knows your truth, the scars under your sleeves or the voices screaming inside your head while you walk with calm and staccato in your steps.You were not Hawkins’ Jason and I could never be Jess. I don’t know exactly which moment or date I transcended from Rachel to Jess, or if I ever did. I watched you from a distance each day, in groups or by yourself and at that moment I could only ever think of you as a magnificent piece of art I wanted to claim as mine. I talked to you as though I had not observed every little detail of yours and how you turned my apathy into something I did not know. As the distance reduced to endless talking all day on the phone, I realised you were not what I had expected you to be. What a fool of myself I have made, thinking that my imagination could trod over into reality and gain life. 

We were thin glass, you and I – fragile yet iridescent. This is the only thread of similarity running between us.

Running away was easier, holding your heart in mine and listening to your heartbeat could never be easy. I am Frangipane’s muse and you’re the boy from the garden state. A catastrophe underway, grenades in hand. When I left, I took the grenades away and blew it up on me.

Categories
life Self Uncategorised

Champagne Supernova

Author: Shatakshi Singh

You’re a champagne supernova,

And you radiate something greater than you know,

Though you shimmer beautifully in the sunshine,

I know you’ll persist through twilight with grace too.

There are many, many posers in this world,

And they will try their best to steal your warmth,

To make us as dull, as they are,

But don’t let them penetrate your mind. 

They say you only live once,

But in a single life, we all lead many lives,

And I know you’ll grow through each phase,

To become an enhanced version of your previous self.

It’s wonderful, the way your mind never stops wandering,

And people might say that wandering is pointless,

But one day you’ll wander in the right direction,

To stumble upon glory and peace.

What’s necessary is to believe you can be, 

And you will be,

Believe in the God within you,

And you’ll elevate yourself to superhuman levels.

I hope you find the love you deserve,

Positive and passionate,

And although you may never find the meaning of love,

You’ll know the feeling when it hits you. 

I know you’re much, much more than what you think you are,

And I know one day you’ll know too,

You’ll take the rocks that people throw at you,

And turn them into stepping stones.

I know you’ll conquer your fears one day,

And also conquer the fear of fear,

And when you’ll be fearless,

There will be hundreds fearful of your strength. 

You’ll discover the wholeness of life,

Breathe and soak it in,

Some experiences will be lessons and some memories,

And you’ll be able to accept them as they are.

You’re a champagne supernova,

And you radiate something greater to than you know,

Though you shimmer beautifully in the sunshine,

I know you’ll persist through twilight with grace too.